within.me?

I cannot sleep.
im hungry...[?] mm.
my mood is...guh.

im in super heavy
love-mushy-flowers-n-candies-pigs-with-wings-fly-and-sit-on-clouds-dreaming..
yeah THAT was random but i feel emo-ish? in lovey? i don't know.

i just crave for him. [his h u g s.] the comfy-ness.

Last night. my mom couldnt sleep. nor could i. i keep tossing. turning.
My mom walked into my room.
We started to talk. it felt awkward. but. kind of nice too..[!!!]
She talked about..MEN. to gave me a two hour plus lecture bout MEN. SEX. MEN. SEX. then about RELIGION.
urh..~
First she bragged about that so called pastor..
*in my previous post
bragged as in really brag how Good looking he was..then complained bout how bastard-ic[??] he is.
then tht woman told me that he was a psychic.. from there..on it went. SEX. She said he nearly raped her.
[i anyways figured that out when i first met him. pastor my anus] HAH!
"he told me u've already lost ur virginity"
uh huh. yeah..sure..

n he knows my grades for my GCSE..and the day my grandmother died..my fav positions n BLAH BLAH BLAH..
[i swear i'll kick u in the nuts if ure in my bloody sight u pastor whatever ur name is.]

i don't believe in such stuffs. altho..i am superstitious..sort of. err. it just FREAKS me out. and i dont like it when she used that tone for "he told me u've already lost ur virginity" it was like low..deep .
...

anyways.
she continued bout Other guys..on and on then says "men are all the same." no. i dont think so. maybe the men she's met were all
the same .

im too lazy to write out the long ass script. im hungry. i eat pizza after 1230am. fattening. carbs. more fats.
i dont care. i'll excercise it away the next day.

10 minutes later*

Forget it. im not having the pizza. MOm came down the stairs. nagging at me. callin me names. SLUT. Dumb cow. again. for no reason..=(

i really miss the good times..
i want to cry

but its not comming out.
.
im off.

-end-

ps: i think i'll have the pizza. and it tastes like rock...no. Cardboard. yuck. =/